When going after big goals and getting out of your comfort zone it is inevitable that you will confront discomfort. This discomfort often comes in the form of fear, nervousness, self-doubt, insecurity and so on and what I have noticed is that many of my clients and myself included, were not prepared on how to handle this discomfort.

It is so common that we are scared and also excited when thinking about getting out of our comfort zone. This includes having to do some public speaking which most likely the emotion of fear will show up in your body. In addition, you may also have some excitement showing up because of the opportunities this visibility might give you.

The first thing I always recommend to my clients is to consciously acknowledge both emotions.

When I signed up for my first long-distance race, I had intense waves of fear and a lot of doubt that I could even finish the race with excitement. I used to worry that the fear, the self-doubt, the insecurity were signs that I shouldn’t do the big scary thing, but what I understand now is that it played an important part in my emotional landscape.

After consciously acknowledging both emotions it can be helpful to spend some time with them and understand what message they are trying to convey. In the example of the long-distance race, the fear of not finishing and having people witness it was an important one to address. 

Instead of pushing this feeling away, avoiding it by not signing up for the run, or resisting it, I choose to welcome it in and work with it. I looked at all the ways that I could prepare myself and allowed the thought of not finishing it as a possibility so that reality would likely not come to fruition.

I downloaded a training app that mapped out all the training runs I would need to do to be prepared for race day. I talked to my trainer who was an avid runner and read articles in running magazines for my preparation. Most importantly, I left room for the fear to be there knowing that it was simply trying to protect me from some rejection, embarrassment, or stress. I reassured the fear that I would do what it takes to prepare so that the possibility of not finishing is very low and that even if we didn’t finish I would be okay.

When we make room for ALL emotions we increase our capacity to feel them and our resiliency improves.

That resiliency builds as we are willing to move toward instead of away from big scary goals. We are more willing to get out of our comfort zone and realize our visions for our lives.  Consciously acknowledging all the emotions that arise, making room for them, understanding them, and then allowing them are hallmarks for success.

If you would like to dive deeper into this work with me to get out of your comfort zone with some support, I invite you to book a connection call with me. Serious inquires only.

Have an amazing week everyone.

Mind Your Strength,

Melanie Shmois

Melanie Shmois, MSSA, LISW-S

Melanie Shmois, MSSA, LISW-S, is a licensed social worker, holding a Master’s Degree (MSSA) from Case Western Reserve University and a B.A. in Sociology with a minor in Spanish. After spending 2 decades helping others achieve their mental and personal goals, Melanie worked with Master Coach Instructor, Brooke Castillo, and became a certified Life and Weight Coach through the Life Coach School.


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