In a previous blog I talked about how vital it is to learn how to allow an urge vs. resisting it, or worse yet giving into an undesired behavior.

Let’s say you have an urge to check Facebook when you should be working on this blog, or have  an intense urge to order a third drink when you are out with your friends even though you know it will lead to a hangover, or have  an urge to grab more dessert at your Memorial Day cookout when you are already full. Having skills to override and manage these urges is a game changer to reaching your goals!

A new tool we have been implementing at the Life Coach School is utilizing an urge jar to help stem unhelpful desires. As you can guess, an urge jar is a simple and effective way to reward your brain when you have successfully allowed an urge vs. giving into an undesired behavior. 

I teach my clients the importance of planning when it comes to achieving their goals to expect that their lower, or primal brain will try to talk them out of it by urging them to do something more pleasurable. When these urges come up, I encourage all of you to let them be there without distracting yourself from it, pushing it away, or resisting it. Just let the urge hang out there.

Once you have seen this process through and the urge ultimately dissipates, then we put a glass bead in an urge jar. The idea is that after approximately 100 drops in the jar, the urge goes away pretty much for good or is at least a lot more tolerable. Visuals and rewards are a great way to track progress when we are trying to change or de-condition ourselves in some way. 

An urge jar can be a simple and effective tool to make progress

I have to admit I to admit I was skeptical about this, but after utilizing it to meditate more I am a believer. For years I have wanted to meditate consistently, but always seemed to give into the urge to do something else when it came time to be still.

I purchased my urge jar and journal and have over 50 beads in there representing 50 meditative sessions and a much calmer vibe.

My clients have been having so much fun and progress with them too. One client has over 15 glass beads in his representing 15 days of sobriety. Another client has over 25 to represent 25 days of exercise, and several of my clients have been using them for weight loss and honoring items on their calendar instead of giving into online shopping or other time wasters.

Your lower brain loves accumulation and will love to add more beads to the jar. It seems silly, but in the moment, the brain will start to want to accumulate more beads rather than eating more cookies.

In addition, the more we allow urges, the less intense they become, and for many people, they decrease in frequency. This can be transformational in weight loss or any other goal you may have. 

If there’s something you’ve wanted to get over for a long time, this can be a simple tool to help. Join me in this fun and effective tool to transform your life. Any new client will automatically get an urge jar during sign-up, so don’t miss out. 

An urge jar+weekly coaching=permanent change!

Let’s have some fun and change your life.

Happy Memorial Day!!!!!

Melanie Shmois, MSSA, LISW-S, Certified Life & Weight Coach
17+years in the field of transformation as a mental trainer

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