Most of us do not understand how perfectionism and procrastination can sort of rear their ugly heads which sometimes in a really sneaky way.
Often perfectionists set really unrealistic expectations. They also tend to be really critical of themselves and often there is a lot of fear of failure and procrastination that can be very paralyzing to a perfectionist. I didn’t really realize that perfectionism and procrastination go hand in hand because what’s really at the core there is a fear of getting it wrong, imperfect, or people will judge you.
I had a massive blind spot by the fact that I’ve been getting ready to get ready. I can be a little bit messy, chaotic in my creativity or how I operate things in a couple of projects in my business but I don’t really label myself as a perfectionist. What I was doing was actually a symptom of perfectionism until one of my coaches spotted it for me.
I was continually getting ready to get ready and then not launching. Underneath that was a fear that I wasn’t ready, that I didn’t have the right graphics or the modules set up exactly how I wanted it – all this perfectionism piece that I didn’t really realize.
Now, I do think that there is a time and place for getting ready or I sometimes term pre-work.
Whenever we’re doing a project, we often have to get the environment ready. We have to get our materials or tools in order so then when it comes to the day we have everything in place. But what I was finding is I was just continually in the pre-work place and almost using that as an excuse to not launch what I wanted to launch.
This actually causes a very predictable, linear paradigm whenever you have something planned. You’re not really able to access anything organic and unique that sometimes only comes in the moment when you’re taking that messy action. In my experience, I didn’t really understand how it was dampening and decreasing my creativity. But I recognize that I wasn’t allowing any organic time or place for me to channel and come up with things in the moment.
Normally, I don’t deem myself a perfectionist or a procrastinator but I will say I’ve had a massive blind spot the last few months on a couple of projects that I keep getting ready to get ready. So I thought if I’m going through this then I’m sure someone out there who is listening has also done this. I think many of us have perfectionist tendencies and it is important to really decipher what makes you a high achiever, a high performer and a perfectionist.
I was in the midst of that and I am now saying, I’m ready.
I’ve done the pre-work and even the pre-work doesn’t have to be perfect. There’s always more to learn, more artwork, technology and logos that could be put in place but I have to cap it off to be in the action phase. It’s okay if the action is a little messy because actually in the moment is where sometimes your greatest insights come.
I remember one time I did a presentation on intuition. Ironically, I didn’t really do a ton of preparation. I had some bullet points which does really help anchor me but in the moment I just came with an open heart, an open mind, and curiosity. I relied on my own experience and whatever came to me I just allowed. It was one of the most special sacred important moments of my career because I was just so in the moment. I just really channeled some beautiful wisdom for the women that were on the call.
Sometimes the actual preparation like preparing too much can hinder that. Coupled with learning to trust myself more and be able to handle any sort of feedback, criticism or questions that might come my way. I have more confidence and trust in that now.
If you are finding yourself staying in that pre-work phase or getting ready to get ready a little too long. I invite you to schedule a one-on-one call with me. I would be happy to help because I’ve obviously been going through it myself and got myself on the other side of it.
Sometimes in the moment with some anchoring points are even more special than if you typed everything out and prepared for everything to make it perfect because there’s no perfection anyways so just be willing to show up, give from your heart and experiences.
I promise you, it will all come together.
I hope this was helpful. Have a wonderful week!
Mind Your Strength,
Melanie Shmois, MSSA, LISW-S, is a licensed social worker, holding a Master’s Degree (MSSA) from Case Western Reserve University and a B.A. in Sociology with a minor in Spanish. After spending 2 decades helping others achieve their mental and personal goals, Melanie worked with Master Coach Instructor, Brooke Castillo, and became a certified Life and Weight Coach through the Life Coach School.