After years of being on diets where someone told me what to eat, what not to eat, or when to eat I developed a strong urge to rebel. For years I would sign up for various weight loss programs and after a week or two in, when the novelty wore off, I wanted to rebel. I wanted to do the exact opposite of what I had set out to do, has this ever happened to you? Here are some reasons why this happens and what to do about it…..
The answer was I was engaging in what we call in coaching, ‘emotional childhood’. This means that we pretend that we don’t want to do what we really want to do. We want to lose weight for example, and then we create a situation where we act as if something outside of us, some authority figure is making us do it so we can then rebel against it. I would often get in this headspace of “Don’t tell me what to do, or what to eat”. This would lend itself to binging on foods that were not on the plan and eventually go off the plan and gain the weight back, plus some. The crazy part was that it was really ME telling myself what to do, what to eat, what not to eat, and not something outside of me.
If this happens to you, what is helpful is recognizing first that the rebel part of you is just your lower or (primitive) brain having a toddler fit. It is the part of the brain that just wants pleasure and does not understand the consequences. It doesn’t know that eating what you want, when you want it, will most likely lead to significant weight gain.
One remedy is to get on the same page with this side of your brain instead of fighting with it. When the toddler part of your brain wants to rebel and tries to convince you to throw in the towel, by throwing a little fit, you just acknowledge it and love yourself and your toddler brain through it. Just like you would with a real toddler who is kicking and screaming for more candy. Fighting against the toddler just makes it worse.
The best way out of emotional childhood is to remind yourself that you are CHOOSING THIS. Acknowledge your fit, don’t fight your thought, but then have the recognition to stay calm and chose a better path. A powerful thought can be “I am choosing to eat this way because I believe it will get me the results I really want” I want to live in a body that feels good to me and this is the pathway there. When we are choosing, we don’t feel restricted or that someone else is imposing their way onto us. We are saying YES to ourselves, yes to keeping commitments to ourselves, YES to evolving. We acknowledge that it is hard and we do it anyway to get to our goal.
Every Tuesday, I host a Thought Tools Tuesday on Facebook Live where I expand on that week’s blog to help you get transformation. Tune in at Mind Your Strength Coaching to learn from my a-ha moments, ask questions, and live YOUR best life.
If you are ready to say YES to yourself and your goals and learn how to have mastery over your brain so it gets you the results you want, I invite you to a consultation call. It is a new month, a new begging and I’d love to help you evolve to the next level and stop rebelling against what you really desire. Book your session here: http://bit.ly/2rD8YZk